Cookies, cheeseburgers, and that sinking feeling

July 24, 2007 at 1:46 pm 4 comments

Hi All,

Back home, back on my own computer (Mac’s rule!!), links all sorted, supershake down me, and ready to face the world, as seen from my pillow. Absolutely exhausted, but travelling with my mum will do that to a person!

I had a breakthrough moment yesterday that I want to share with you. After lunch, I ordered a coffee and it came with a mini chocolate chip cookie on the side. Normally, it wouldn’t have even touched the sides on the way down, but I let it sit there, and simply eyed it suspiciously. You would simply not believe the dialogue that went through my head, inspired by this tiny little cookie, about the size of the circle made by putting your thumb and forefinger together.

I looked at it… I resisted… I counted the chocolate chips… I drank my coffee…Well, I thought, I can’t eat it now, after the long lectures I’ve been giving my mother – she knows I’m not supposed to eat it… and not after all the fuss I’ve made thus far about getting PN-friendly food… Maybe I could just slip it in my mouth and she wouldn’t notice?…Wait, do I actually want it?…I certainly don’t need it…Nah, I don’t want it, I’m being sooo good, and I’m really proud of myself…But it’s just sitting there, looking at me…It can’t be more than 50-odd calories, what could it hurt?…I am not controlled by a cookie, I have my own will…I wonder what will happen to it if I don’t eat it; will it get thrown away? Shame to waste it….No, I can resist, I don’t even LIKE chocolate chip cookies particularly…Oh, mum’s gone back to the room…she wouldn’t know if I ate it….

And then I got up and went back to the room too, leaving that poor, lonely, chocolate chip cookie sitting on the side of the saucer by my empty coffee cup. This was a very symbolic moment in my life. I don’t think I’ve ever done the like before.

Afternoon snack was good and healthy, but by evening I was ravenous and craving carbohydrates. OK, I thought, let’s make this one of my ‘cheat’ meals. For non-PN readers, we are allowed 4 meals per week which don’t comply with PN guidelines. So I ordered a cheeseburger, fries, 2 scoops of coffee icecream, and a pot of hot chocolate. This was in a nice hotel, mind, so the burger was really good quality ground beef and the cheese was gruyere. Can’t do much with the fries, though. Do they count as a serving of veg??? Probably needed to wait after the burger to let it go down, but the ice cream was melting so rushed that down too. Damn, did I feel sick after all that. That would have been a pretty normal meal for me before Precision Nutrition. I was still feeling rough a couple of hours later. Skipped my evening snack and went to bed early instead. Perhaps I should have eaten the cookie.

One last thought. Today, on our way back to the UK, we came through two airports. Everytime I rounded a corner and saw a flight of steps my heart sank. When there was an escalator too, I took that. At one point, waiting for my mum to come out of the ladies’, I watched various people, of all shapes and sizes, young and old, come round the corner and walk straight up the stairs, ignoring the automated version completely. That’s my goal. I want to be one of those people.

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Entry filed under: exercise, fat loss, heath and fitness, inspiration, motivation, nutrition, Precision Nutrition, weight loss.

Week 1 Results Hiccoughs

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. practiceliving  |  July 24, 2007 at 4:19 pm

    Way to work through your thoughts with the cookie. I think so much changes with our eating habits when we stop for a second and think about what we’re about to munch – why we want it, what need it would fill, etc., just as you did. Bravo!

    Also – excellent goal with the stairs! I’m a stair person, but only to a point – too many stairs and my knees start screaming, no matter my weight. Bah.

    Reply
  • 2. blubberbegone  |  July 24, 2007 at 8:16 pm

    Thanks, I just hope the cookie had a good and happy life before it went to that great cookie tin in the sky.

    Despite bad knees myself, it is my heart and lungs that scream. Quite frightening in a woman not yet 40. What have I done to myself?

    Reply
  • 3. Vilma Perez  |  July 24, 2007 at 10:37 pm

    Hey there! Nice to have you back… I’m back too, writing that is. I will update my blog regularly now. Way to conquer the cookie… if it was chocolate chip, I don’t know if I would of been strong enough. 😀

    Love your goal about the stairs… you will get there soon!!!

    Keep up the GREAT work!

    Stay STRONG! Stay MOTIVATED!

    All the best,

    ~ Vilma

    http://vphealthandfitness.wordpress.com

    Reply
  • 4. blubberbegone  |  July 24, 2007 at 11:15 pm

    Hi Vilma,

    Thanks for that. Nice to see you again. How many blogs do you write on, by the way. I lost track last time I checked out your site!

    Reply

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Blubberbegone Stats

  • Start: 16 stone, 45.7% body fat
  • Goal: 10 stone, 20% body fat
  • Today: 14 stone 13.6 lbs, 44.8% BF
  • Pounds lost: 14.4
  • Body fat lost: 0.9%
  • Exercise this week (Sat–Fri):
  • Total: 2 hr 5 mins
  • Jog/Walk: 20 mins
  • Walking: 20 mins
  • Burlesque: 1 hr
  • Pilates: 25 mins
  • African dance: mins
  • Tae Kwon Do: mins
  • Badminton: mins
  • Tai Chi: mins
  • Yoga: hr
  • Exercise last week: 4 hrs 40 mins
  • Joke of the Day

    I'm not fat - I'm a woman and a half.

    Motivation

    My Weight Loss Goals

  • 1. Crack 15 stone (210 lbs) for the fourth and final (I hope) time.
  • 2. Lose 10% of my body fat (14 stone 4).
  • 3. Fit into a size 18 (US 16).
  • 4. Get my body fat below 40%
  • 5. Lose another 10% of my body fat (12 stone 12/180 lbs).
  • 6. Get my BMI under 30 (12 stone 9/177 lbs) - no longer obese, just overweight now.
  • 7. Weigh less than my husband.
  • 8. Fit into a size 16 (US 14).
  • 9. Lose my third 10% (11 stone 8/162 lbs).
  • 10. Fit into a size 14 (US 12).
  • 11. Get my BMI under 25 (10 stone 8/148 lbs).
  • 12. Lose my fourth 10% (10 stone 6/ 146 lbs).
  • 13. Fit into a size 12 (US 10).
  • 14. Reach my goal weight (10 stone) and decide if I need to lose any more based on my muscularity and shape.
  • 15. Turn heads in a bikini!
  • My Fitness Goals for 2011

  • 1. Increase my cruising walking speed from around 5.0kph to 6.4kph.
  • 2. Increase continuous jogging time to 30 mins.
  • 3. Run a 5K for charity.
  • 4. Work on my crawl stroke and build up to 30 mins continuous swimming.
  • 5. Build up to 1 hour continuous and comfortable cycling.
  • 6. Squat 50kg.
  • 7. Do an unassisted chin up.
  • 8. Take a martial arts or self-defence class for at least 3 months.
  • 9. Beat my husband at badminton.
  • 10. Learn a new dance style.
  • My Blubber Reduction Journey

  • My highest measured weight ever:
  • Jan 1 2006 = 238 lbs (17 stone)
  • BBG blog starting weight:
  • Sep 16 2007 = 215.5 lbs (15 stone 5.5), 47.0% BF Lean body mass 114.2 lbs (8 stone 2.2)
  • Highest weight posted since then:
  • Xmas 2008 = 223.6 lbs (15 stone 13.6), 48.2% BF, lean body mass 116.0 lbs (8 stone 4)
  • Lowest weight posted since then:
  • Nov 16 2009 = 193.2 lbs (13 stone 11.2), 43.7% BF, lean body mass 108.8 lbs (7 stone 10.8)
  • Lowest body fat posted since then:
  • Sep 7 2009 = 194.2 lbs (13 stone 12.2), 42.6% BF, lean body mass 111.5 lbs (7 stone 13.5)
  • My blubber reduction journey 2011:
  • Xmas 2010 = 221.6 lbs, 46.7% BF, 118.1 lbs LBM
  • 5 Jan = 221.0 lbs, 47.1% BF
  • 12 Jan = 219.6 lbs, 45.8% BF
  • 19 Jan = 220.4 lbs, 45.8% BF (TTOM)
  • 26 Jan = 218.8 lbs, 45.2% BF
  • 2 Feb = 218.8 lbs, 44.7% BF
  • 9 Feb = 219.4 lbs, 44.9% BF
  • 16 Feb = 215.8 lbs, 44.6% BF
  • 23 Feb = 213.2 lbs, 45.2% BF
  • 2 Mar = 211.6 lbs, 45.9% BF
  • 9 Mar = 209.8 lbs, 45.1% BF
  • 16 Mar = 208.8 lbs, 45.3% BF
  • 23 Mar = 208.0 lbs, 45.1% BF
  • 13 Apr = 208.4 lbs, 44.4% BF
  • 20 Apr = 207.6 lbs, 43.3% BF
  • 27 Apr = 205.0 lbs, 45.8% BF
  • 4 May = 209.2 lbs, 45.2% BF (TTOM)
  • No. weeks: 18
  • Average weekly weight loss: 0.31%
  • 101 in 1001

    28 down, 5 goals revoked, 68 to go, and 94 days to do them. Check out the 101 page, above, for all the latest on my journey to be a better blubberbegone.

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